Pink- To Love is Pain
by ContrivedCoffee
Summary: Pink...One word that described everything she could never be. Love is more pain than anything else to Hinata.


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Somehow, ever since she'd been a child, she had never liked the colour pink.  
 _Pink_. A colour of finesse to many. A colour of satisfaction. A colour of _la femina fatalé..._  
 _Pink_. A creation of nature that sets out a rather delicate yet exotic, rave image through its various hues...  
An image she'd never been able to claim as her own.  
Most of the women who complimented the colour were adequate; delicate and feminine. And yet there were powerful, assertive women who managed it too..a woman whose feminine poise combined with raw esteem and self-confidence...a woman who was a man's every desire. There was only one such woman she could think of...  
As for herself, she was neither strong nor anything even vaguely desirable. At least not to the person who mattered the most.  
She was nothing, in a way... Just a grown woman whom everyone around viewed as a vulnerable little girl who needed to be shielded and protected from the demons of the real world, what she wouldn't have been able to face.  
Little did they know that the biggest demons were the ones within her.  
A disregarding father. A mother who had died giving birth to her sister, whose love she could barely remember... The only reason she felt she even existed was to be a part of her clan's tremulous politics... Hardly something nice to look ahead to everyday.  
Self-pity wasn't something that she liked to entertain, but now she allowed it to flow, without restriction out of the deep, dark and ugly corners of her subconscious where it had been buried...so close to the surface.

 _Pink._ Hate wasn't something that came naturally to her, but now she felt something quite close coursing. Hatred for the fact that she hadn't been able to stop what happened that cold, winter's day more than a decade ago. At the time it had felt so warm,pleasant, something that gave her a few things she could look forward to.  
 _She'd fallen in love._  
She knew now, the moment she had glimpsed that reassuring smile under those cerulean eyes and wild mop of blond hair, it was all over. Would she ever be able to love another? New pain came to visit uninvited, and somehow never really left. And yet she did not stop loving him. She seemed incapable of it. She still was.  
She knew that Naruto would never look at her as anything more than a fellow ninja, a childhood comrade. _Yet her love never ceased_.  
Every time she saw him try to impress _her_ , and the way he would persist even though all she did was ignore and mock him through their teenage years. Her love never ceased.  
Watching the way he'd gone down on one knee and drawn a small velvet box at the supposed " Happy-returning-from-your-A rank-mission" party he had thrown the rosette picture of perfection and their teammates.  
Nobody noticed how her face had paled, how her fists had clenched or how she had stopped breathing; after all, that was unimportant in comparison to what they were witnessing, was it not? The room was full of wolf-whistles and congratulations for the now engaged couple that were locked in a kiss, her hands around his neck and her waist in his. Her vision swam, her blood turned to ice. Of course nobody knew, she wasn't one to reveal her problems. She would never forget how she'd tried to stumble home, heavy sobs wracking through her limp body. How Kiba had found her beside an old dustbin surrounded by three stray cats on the street outside the party two hours later, her eyes wide open and staring into oblivion. How she had quietly nodded when he'd suggested that Sake wasn't quite for her people like her; even though she had never tasted a drop.  
It had hurt. A lot. More than she could have ever imagined. No pain could ever surpass it.  
Except it had been, at the perfect couple's perfect wedding she had forced herself to attend. Nobody noticed the petite ink-haired woman leaving the extensively decorated halls just as Man and wife embraced ... _And her love still refused to cease._

Hearts never really stop wanting what they want, she guessed.  
 _Pink... The one word that defined everything that she could never be_.  
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Please leave me a review, they make my day. I do not hate Sakura, I just wanted to experiment with my writing. I know this one-shot is rather sombre and depressing; but I assure you that if it gets a good response, I'll write a happy one with a pairing of your choice, so don't forget that review. And lastly, PM me if you have any requests or ideas you wish to see in a story, I really appreciate it. Also, check out my poem Byakugan-hime on my account.  
Yours truly,  
ByakuganProdigy


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